A mother will always remember the moment she first heard the heartbeat of her child during her prenatal appointment.  This came with anticipation, expectation and wonder of the miracle within her.

This same life force is carried within all of us….for the zillion ideas that cross our path, and make our heart skip abit in excitement.  Imagine if we paid attention with a mother-to-be’s focus and expectation for the creation we carry in its infancy.  We must listen for the heartbeat….ours!  It comes at unexpected times – the light through the trees, the melody that pops into our minds, the color needed to complete the design project, the resolution to that nagging issue, the perfect plan to move forward on a project, etc.  They all are there, on our radar, if we look intently and in expectation.  And we can cultivate an awareness of that visceral reaction when we listen intently, when we pay attention.

I recently attended a local theatre community’s production of Working by Studs Terkel.  He was a master of listening; he roamed the country engaging a cross-section of Americans in tape recorded chats – about their dreams, fears, racism, courage, music – and then transcribed and edited them, to compile their oral histories in books that celebrated the common people, whom he liked to call the “uncelebrated”.  He first listened to this spark of an idea within himself, and then listened intently for the development of that first heartbeat, as he completed his many interviews, and eventually, his books; he heard and recorded a heartbeat of American people by first listening to the idea beating within himself.

Too often creativity is thought of only as the final product.  But it begins with a spark……..a listening for our heartbeat, in excitement for the potential of new life, a new creation, emerging from us.  And it’s no coincidence I speak of heartbeat, for this visceral reaction is most often strongly tied to what we love.  Shhhhshhshhhshh………listen!

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In the movie A Knight’s Tale, an elderly father supports his son’s desire to leave his medieval home in hopes of becoming a knight for the king.  Both were in conflict:  the father wanted better for his son than the pauper life he was born into, but knew his son would probably never return to his home after tasting the royal life.  The son aspired for service to the king, and was afraid he’d never find his way home if his path took him so far away.  The father’s parting words to his son were “Change your stars and always follow your feet.”

His poignant and wise words offer some lessons for life coaching as we create a better life for ourselves. 1)  It is necessary to stay grounded while following our starry visions…both are needed to manifest the more that we desire.  Imagining gets realized only by the action we take to step into that vision, and vice versa:  we wander aimlessly without the target of that vision.  2)  Moving away from the familiar in order to follow our dreams takes risk; it takes courage to change our stars as opposed to passively tolerating the status quo.  We all resist change, but our inner boredom/restlessness are signs to pay attention to.  If you wish to stay engaged with life, at times it feels as if we just must change our stars, leaving the familiar without a certainty of where our path will lead.  3) It is likely we will never return to this place exactly as we left it.  We keep changing, and so does the place we let go of.  However, we carry the best of our previous living within us, and build on those resources as we find our way.  We can return to the home we loved, but as a changed-for-the-better person.  Our feet, our inner wisdom, will carry us into an expanded life as well as deepen us into the roots of our being.  We grow and evolve in a spiral fashion, rather than linear, so even when we come full circle, we are renewed by our journey.  This is the classic hero’s journey, the odyssey, that has beckoned us all on a journey to renewal; we return home (our internal being) but functioning at a renewed level.

So, YES, go for it – change your stars!  And…follow your feet to a more expanded, deeper being.

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The best protection any woman can have . . . is courage. Elizabeth Cady Stanton

Elizabeth Cady Stanton was a coach for public speaking with Susan B. Anthony, who was a woman’s activist, leading and inspiring women to become acting subjects in their own destiny. There is a greater sense of well-being when we are in command of our own ship. Susan B. Anthony was an American women’s rights activist who is known for her association with the women’s suffrage movement, and certainly drew upon her courage in order to pioneer equality for women.

Today, Brene Brown also calls us to courage, and empathy, as an antidote to vulnerability and shame.  She speaks to the results of her research on vulnerability in her TED talk, and in her latest book Daring Greatly.   I have witnessed and experienced shame as a lethal undermining of well-being; one is held captive by secrecy, silence and judgment, basically as feeling “never good enough”.  Our culture, religions, and professional measures of success all feed into this dis-ease of epidemic proportions, no class of people immune to its effects.  We all try to do it all, try to do it perfectly, showing no weakness, competing to stay above the mire that shame can drag us into.  Guilt is a different feeling – it is about behavior.  Shame attacks the self, our being.  So the antidote must respond on the being level:  empathy for universal vulnerability, wholehearted embrace of our humanness.  We applaud those who take risks, who keep trying in spite of apparent failures, who persist in courageous steps forward.  We have a felt connection with this honest, authentic striving more than with the successful, perfectly done deed. We would rather witness someone who is daring greatly.  As Brene Brown states:  What we know matters, but who we are matters more.  Being requires…showing up and letting ourselves be seen.  It requires us to dare greatly, to be vulnerable.

So I say YES to courage – courage to face the fear of not being good enough but rather wholeheartedly keep trying, learning from your mistakes, carving out your destiny – embracing your vulnerability as the medium of change, the birthplace of creativity and empowerment in your life.  Embracing yourself with courage and empathy is the best protection you can have towards your well-being.

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.  The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly…who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly.         Theodore Roosevelt

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Many small businesses begin as a one person show, until it grows enough to require hiring a team to ease up all the “doing” so you are able to continue the “being” of the business.  This stage of growth is a great sign for your success and it presents some different challenges.  I’ve been thinking about how “leading” a business (rather than doing it all yourself) is similar to coaching.  A good leader empowers others to make decisions and take action that aligns with the vision, purpose and strategies of your business. While you are totally committed to the business, the focus is on the team, empowering and rewarding them, listening to them on the front lines, who are your eyes that see and report valuable information for continued success.

As a “doer”, it is often much easier to just “do it yourself” instead of empowering and guiding the team. Leading through empowerment attains a culture of ownership and gratification in a job well done by the team. Having confidence in your skills and accomplishments allows you to get out of the way, and focus on helping them now execute the strategies/purpose/vision for the business.  The team looks to you for optimism, confidence and assurance; believing in them, inspiring and guiding them, can help them say “Oh, yes I can!” and prove to be capable and willing to stretch in achieving goals.

This business growth transition from “me” to “we” asks you to wear a different hat.  The quality of your leadership is measured by the successes of others, which in turn contributes to your business’ success.  Your challenge is to move beyond the “what” focus of tasks, guiding and empowering your team to execute that, to be the “doers” – and you wear the hat of leader, “being”,  holding the vision, the “why” focus of your business’ purpose.

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Spring is a season of new life, nature’s expression of all its creative beauty.  All life forms have faithfully followed their nature’s expression in its cyclical forms.  The transformational process from a seed to sprout to blossom to fruit occurs without question; the light leads the way, and nature follows.  Each stage of this cycle is imperative for the next, and each yields to the next future pull naturally.

A caterpillar will never figure out a butterfly’s path; it must go thru the process.  We can learn from this humble creature.  We must simply and faithfully follow each small step as we are led by our creative nature within….doodle that idea that flashed through your mind today; call that resource you think might answer that question that feels like an obstacle; outline the template as a beginning structure….whatever calls you to action, go there, trusting the process.  This is like the trust, the knowing of the caterpillar, as it continues in their process.  The activity may seem obscure, unrelated to a larger vision, but the only way to get there is to go through the process, and have faith that you will fly as you realize your vision, and be transformed in the process.  You change with each step of the way, expanding, knowing more than you did before, ever faithful to your innate creative call from within.  Total trust in your creative nature brings your nature’s expression…….and gifts us all.

Creativity lies within each one of us; we are wired for creativity.  So it is our nature to express it, in our own style.  So many deny this innate feature of themselves, confining creativity only to the arts.  But everyone has made a life for themselves, and engages their creativity in the art of living, whether they are conscious of it or not.

Now take the next step, ok?  I want to see you fly!

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A story is told of a man who found an eagle’s egg. He put it with his chickens and the mother hens.

Soon the egg hatched. The young eagle grew up with all the other chickens. Whatever the chickens did, the eagle also did. He thought he was a chicken, just like them.

Since the chickens could only fly for a short distance, the eagle also learnt to fly a short distance. He thought that was what he was supposed to do. So that was all that he thought he could do. And that was all he was able to do.

One day the eagle saw a bird flying high above him. He was very impressed. “Who is that?” he asked the hens around him.

“That’s the eagle, the king of the birds,” the hens told him. “He belongs to the sky. We belong to the earth – we are chickens.

So the eagle lived and died a chicken, for that’s what he thought he was.

Moral of the story:  Don’t conform – follow your destiny.

Our soul’s yearning, much like the eagle experienced when he saw another eagle soaring, is our call to step into our largesse.  We are not meant to live small.  Some clues that you may be living too small might be boredom, depression from the repression of yourself, feeling confined and limited, etc.  Our natural growth pattern is to expand, to break out of our previously safe boundaries (structures), and if we fail to use our courage to do so, we will feel the consequences.  The company we keep can echo our fears, and support our staying safe in limiting ourselves, or they can encourage us to follow our destiny for growth and expansion, and soar to greater heights.   When seeking guidance, don’t listen to the tiny-hearted.  Clarissa Pinkola-Estes

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“Thousands of things go right for you every single day.” Rob Brezsny

Do you see the cup half empty or do you see the cup half full?  We are all too familiar with the sense of craving; our culture reinforces us to want more.  The truth is that we live in overwhelming abundance; we already have most of what matters most to us.  Our cup really is full – we really have/do/are enough already.  Connecting to our profound sense of being takes us to that underlying fullness.  We connect inside of ourselves to our natural goodness, our spirit.

Wellness implies that you would take care of yourself.  This often entails “having” or “doing” many things to achieve this.  And it is so easy to keep our focus on the cup half empty – the exercise I can’t seem to fit into my schedule, the sugar or soda I can’t seem to do without, the balance in life I just can’t get a handle on.  One of Deepok Chopra’s health meditations speaks to allowing your body to take care of you.  The body knows instinctively what you need, and offers it abundantly, infinitely.  Think of this as something breathing you, as life taking care of you.  This Intelligent Wisdom activates our natural healing system, and we need only to minimize our negative influence.  Getting out of the way, and responding from within, listening to what this Intelligent Wisdom would have us do to experience the miracle we live in everyday – we live in enough already.  More than a thousand things go right for us every single day that contribute to our well-being.  Take note and Celebrate!

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Edison failed 10,000times before he made the electric light.  Do not be discouraged if you fail a few times.     –Napoleon Hill, 1883-1970

Napoleon Hill knew persistence.  He was born in a 1 room cabin in Appalachia; his mother died when he was 9 years old.  At 13, he became a reporter for mountain news, setting aside his earnings to go to law school.  He had to withdraw from law school eventually for financial reasons.  But in his persistence, as he was interviewing  famous successful men, Andrew Carnegie asked him to interview 500 successful people, as he believed success could be outlined in a formula; Napoleon would gather this information so he could discover and publish this formula.

In this process, Carnegie introduced Napoleon to Henry Ford, who introduced him to Alexander Graham Bell, then Edison, James J. Hill, Firestone, Schwab, Woolworth, Wrigley, etc.  Twenty years later (now that’s persistence), he published his multi-volume The Law of Success (1928), which listed 45 people and the attributes of their success.  Hill also was an advisor to Woodrow Wilson (1913-21) and FDR (1933-36).

Napoleon Hill is known as an author in the new thought movement, a genre of personal success literature.  His best selling work is Think & Grow Rich which sold over 20 million copies at the time of his death.  It is about the power of personal beliefs and the role they play in personal success. His son, Blair, who was born without ears or hearing organs, picked us his father’s book when he was a senior in college, and learned what his father had discovered regarding the secret to success. He grew up to eventually hear and speak normally, and went on to inspire others on the power of personal beliefs.  Certainly he practiced persistence in this miraculous outcome!

I’ve written about this persistence before, calling it “grit” or practice, practice, practice.  Our success originates in our minds – In what do I truly believe? – and follows with lots of action that plays out our beliefs.  So are you investing your efforts with persistence in a belief FOR your success or a belief that sabotages your success?  Line this up on your behalf and persistently succeed – you have the power!!!

On this first day of spring, plant your seeds for new growth, both in your mind and in your actions, and persist until they bear the fruit of the inevitable summer your success will lead you to.

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“You are the laboratory and every day is an experiment. Go and find what is new and unexpected.”  –Joel Elkes

Showing up to engage with our creative nature is the first step – then what?  Often we get overwhelmed with so many ideas, or we don’t have ANY ideas.  Or we jump from one idea to the next without the focus that is needed to develop it.  Or we are met with the inevitable fear that comes with an expanding territory-our creativity.  So we disengage so as to not feel that discomfort of fear.  But then the discomfort/regret of not trying the idea hounds us.  We call this place stuck.

I recently did an interview with Laurie Mattila, founder of Discovery Writing, about discover-ease in  experimenting with small steps that can lead to big results.  The vehicle she uses is writing but any process(painting, breadmaking, knitting, cooking, etc.) can serve this purpose: to follow that inner pull to try things which open your life to what is important.  Experimenting moves you forward and enriches your life.  Changing any routine (process) you find yourself in can be a vehicle for your own small step experimenting.  Practicing this strengthens your skills in risk-taking and embracing uncertainty; these are valuable in creative expression AND in life.

But the key is to keep the steps so small that fear doesn’t sabotage forward movement.  They are of minimal impact, ones that don’t disrupt your life but do take you out of your comfort zone.  Just trying things unleashes that creative energy within you.  She calls it “playing” with bringing newness into your life – to get more comfortable in the not knowing.  You get a good feeling about trying something new, and are more apt to do it again;  if you have one idea, you’ll have more.  It generates confidence – you’re not stuck – you’ve chosen to do something instead of dreaming without any action.

So experiment with experimenting.  Change up a routine, practice opening to try new ways of doing things, and notice what you discover. Get comfortable with not knowing and enjoy discovering.  This will help you engage with creativity more easily, and certainly will help you engage with life more fully.  And by all means, HAVE FUN!

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In the course of our lives, how many times do we find ourselves starting over?  More than we can count, I’d say, for life has so many beginnings/endings/beginnings as we flow in that river of change.  And more than not, I’d say we find ourselves going ‘round full circle, back at a starting point.  Life expands in a spiral fashion, not in a linear one.  So honing your skills in starting over is a good thing – not a sign of weakness.  It shows your ability to learn from your experience, and have the courage to tweak your path to better include your dreams, growing and expanding in your own wisdom.  This takes determination and character.

Late American writer, John Steinbeck, wrote a story called The Red Pony, that holds a poignant message for us.  In the story, young Jody wakes up on the second of February crying in the night.  His mother hears him cry and calls to him, “Jody, you’re dreaming.  Wake up and start over again.”  Yes, we are dreaming, and when our dream life doesn’t satisfy us, we must wake up; we must consciously face the dissonance we feel, and choose to start over again.  Staying connected to our dreams, AND being willing to alter our course, even start over on a better course if needed, will support the unfolding of what makes our life satisfying and fulfilling.

Be not afraid…….wake up and start over again.

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