Women’s life coaching: Blockage to Breakthrough

Do you know research shows that there is a 22% improvement with training – but with coaching there is an 88% improvement?  What a difference!  I believe it has to do with underlying, subconscious beliefs that sabotage our best intentions. I heard an interview with Paul Gilbert, a clinical psychologist who has researched evolutionary approaches to psychopathology for over 35 years with a special focus on shame and the treatment of shame based difficulties.  In his discussion of the evolution of our brain, he said we have 3 motivational systems: 1) Threat, in which our survival mechanisms kick in to avoid a threat; 2) Drive, in which we go towards reward; and 3) Green, in which we experience calm, contented well-being- this state allows the body to heal.

What does this have to do with coaching, and more specifically, blockages?  Very often people set goals that are well-intentioned, working towards greater success.  However, if there may be an underlying sense of inadequacy, or a need to earn love or attain success to prove one’s worth, the threat intensifies if this doesn’t work out.  They are trying to resolve a threat (#1 above), when really addressing a self-esteem issue (#3 above).  All the best-stated intentions can be undermined by the fears that are operating on a subtle energy level.  Unfortunately, our brain is wired to default to the negative, so without a conscious practice to operate out of #3, we will be wrestling with ourselves, wondering why we can’t move forward or achieve our goals.   Well-being must first be established in order for the rest to fall in place.

How we identify ourselves in relationship to the world is how we experience the world, on an energy level.  Our subconscious programs our body to carry out this internal story.  To develop a new reality, we must create an image of self in a bigger way, and hold that image in our mind until it shows up in our experience.  Our emotional self accelerates this process.  So if we feel unworthy but are asking for a raise, guess what will materialize – the emotions win out.  But if we see ourselves receiving the raise,  plus feeling it in our emotional being (feeling like a million bucks), this higher frequency of what we desire will attract what resonates with our frequency.  And THIS is the practice: to hold that vision, and feel it on every level, over and over again, until it shows up in your life.  Most people give up, and say this doesn’t work.  And then, that’s what they attract – it doesn’t work.  The internal blockages must be addressed so you radiate the energy you wish to bring to form.  You MUST have faith to take in what you already hold on an energy level…….the outward form is simply that slowest and last step in the manifestation of what you desire.  You must make it a part of your identity to experience it; you first experience it internally, and become that thing.  What you want is not out there, it is only in here.  The very story we tell ourselves is powerful……….BE what you wish to manifest or create.

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